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Putt-Putt Travels Through Time
(After the intro, we cut to the G-man at his desk in his room) G-man: Hello, everyone! I am the G-man, and that’s all you need to know about that. Well, it’s been a long time coming, but we’re finally looking at a Humongous Entertainment game! (Cut to clips from multiple Humongous Entertainment games) G-man (V.O): Founded in 1996 and defunct 10 years later, this was home to millions of peoples’ childhoods. Ironically, the official website is still up, and many people are still talking about this. Today, we’re taking a look at my favorite series from this company: Putt-Putt. To sum it up, it features living vehicles before Disney’s Cars was a thing. (Cut back to the G-man) G-man: The game we’re looking at is the third game in the series. What’s it called? (Cut to the opening for…) Background singers (V.O singing): Putt-Putt Travels Through Time! (Cut back to the G-man) G-man: As much I want to get into this, I really want to share this with someone else! (He pulls out his iPhone) Well, let’s call someone up! (Cut to Vinesauce Vinny on his computer when his phone rings) Vinny: The hell…? (He picks it up) Hello? (The caller turns out to be the G-man. During his and Vinny’s conversation, it cuts between them) G-man: Yo, Vinny. Get over here! Vinny: Can it wait? I’m in the middle of- G-man (Interrupting): Nah, man! It’s reviewing time! Vinny (After sighing): I’ll be right there… (Cut to a time card that says "Later…", and then to the two on a couch in the G-man’s living room. This is where they spend the rest of the review) G-man: Alright, here we go! This is Putt-Putt Travels Through Time! Vinny: Who-now? (Cut to the opening cutscene) G-man (V.O): It opens with Putt-Putt on his way to Mr. Firebird’s workshop to, quote: "Show him his history report, and his other school supplies". Vinny (V.O): In this game, everyone uses some kind of extendable arm thing to grab stuff. It’s never explained as to what exactly it is, but who knows? Maybe its also how they procreate. G-man (V.O): Upon arriving, we learn that Mr. Firebird created a time portal that requires a coin to activate. Putt-Putt: Great! And then I can show you my history report, and my new school supplies! (Cut back to the duo) Vinny: Dude, c’mon! I’ve got a time portal! We can go anywhere we want! G-man: That’s cool and all, but I have a mechanical pencil! (He pulls one out) See? You push the button, and- (Vinny punches the G-man before we cut back to the game) Vinny (V.O): However, something goes awry, and Putt-Putt’s belongings get sucked into the portal. This includes his history report, his lunchbox, his calculator, and his dog named Pep. G-man (V.O): And what do you do when you lose your things in time? Go through the time portal, obviously! Seriously, isn’t any of this going to cause a paradox? Anyway, we head through the portal, and… (Cut to inside the portal) Whoa…! Putt-Putt: It’s like a science fiction movie! Except, I have a feeling that this is reality! (Cut back to the duo) Duo (Simultaneously): Riiight… (Cut back to the game) G-man (V.O solo): This is also one of those games where your stuff lands in different areas, so you can expect a different game every time you play. Vinny (V.O solo): Also, if you click on these living time pieces in the hub, you get a song number. Thankfully, it’s the only one in the game, but seeing as how it’s pointless, we’ll skip over it. G-man (V.O): Our first stop is the future where everything is in the sky. I would make a Jetsons joke, but instead, I feel it would be appropriate to do the exact opposite since Vinny’s here. Vinny (V.O): Oh, God… Please don’t show a clip of-! (He gets cut off as we cut to the title screen for…) Vinesauce Joel (V.O): GRAND DAD?! (Cut back to the duo) Vinny: I really need to learn when to keep my mouth shut… (Cut back to the game) G-man (V.O): As with every Putt-Putt game, you can change his color. Here, it’s a machine in the future. But wait! What color? Blue? Red? Yellow? Uh… Purple! (Cut back to the duo) G-man: Money. Well. Spent. (Cut back to the game) Vinny (V.O): In this playthrough, Pep is on a mechanical platform in the future. In order to get to him, you press either red or yellow buttons on each platform. If you press the wrong one, you go all the way back to the beginning. After we get him, we also find a minigame on the same platform; an arcade cabinet called Squish. It’s not essential to the plot, but its pretty fun nonetheless. G-man (V.O): Alright, what’s in this museum? Robot: Welcome to our museum! I am Arthur T. Fact; the program curator. But you may call me R. T. Fact! (Cut back to the duo looking unamused) G-man: Hey Vinny, want to get the fact out of here? Vinny: Fact yeah. (Cut back to the game) G-man (V.O): Up next is the Old West where our lunchbox is. In the stable, we find some hay and a rope, and then we head to the train station where we oil a train’s wheels, while keeping the oil can in the process. Train: Oh, much better! A thousand thanks, amigo! Putt-Putt: You’re welcome, Toby! Toby: Say, I didn’t catch your name. Putt-Putt: My name’s Putt-Putt! Toby: Well, Putt-Putt, my partner, so far you made a mighty-fine junior conductor. Here’s your pay; one round nickel! (Cut back to the duo) Vinny: Dude, we just saved your carrier, and possibly your life! And what do we get? A coin that’s more outdated than the first iPhone! (Cut back to the game) Vinny (V.O): We find the lunchbox with some prospector who is panning for gold in a river. Putt-Putt: But that’s not meant for panning for gold, that’s my lunchbox! It belongs to me! Prospector: You say you have a… A bunch of foxes stuck in a tree? G-man (V.O): Wow, you must be the kid in class who got all A’s on each test! (There’s a moment of silence before the G-man speaks again) Or the one who ate glue… Anyway, we’ll go back to the lunchbox later. For now, we’re headed to Medieval Times where the calculator is. We meet Princess Chasse, and her friend; a wood cart named… (He sighs) Woodward. (Cut to a clip from the SpongeBob SquarePants episode; Band Geeks) Squidward: Too bad that didn’t kill me… (Cut back to the game) Vinny (V.O): After we help them, we head into the castle. We have the blacksmith who has no purpose in this playthrough, King Chariot who also has no purpose, and Merlin the Wizard. Whom of which has our calculator. However, like everyone else in these kinds of games, he won’t give it to us unless we do a favor for him. G-man (V.O): He wants a power source to work his machine, and we can find that in the future. After getting it, we receive our calculator. Now, we can also get what we need for the prospector to get our lunchbox back. All we need are some colored rocks from the Old West. (Cut back to the duo) G-man: Also, it’s never explained as to how the machine works, nor how he made it. All we’re supposed to assume is that the only explanation is magic. Vinny: On top of that, if Merlin is all-knowing and powerful, why can’t he power it himself? (Cut back to the game) G-man (V.O): Either way, we get our lunchbox back, and all that’s left is our history report. And we can find that in our fourth and final time period: The Prehistoric Era. Vinny (V.O): After moving a dinosaur tail and fixing a bridge, we find our history report. It’s being stood on by a triceratops who is eating a plant. Thankfully, we already have just what we need: The hay from the Old West. After we feed it to him, we get our history report, Mr. Firebird closes the time portal, and that’s the end. (Cut back to the duo) G-man: And that was Putt-Putt Travels Through Time! It brought me so many memories, and like we said before; the items we found can be in different places each time you play, so no two playthroughs are alike! (To Vinny) Well, thanks for joining me, Vinny! Vinny: Hey, no problem! That was actually pretty good! See ya! (He gets up to leave, but the G-man’s voice stops him) G-man: Hold up! Before you go… Vinny: Uh… G-man: Say it. Vinny: Say what? G-man: You know what! Vinny (Sighing): Fine… SPEEN! G-man: YAAAAY! Vinny: I hate you… (He leaves the room) G-man: Houston, we have no problems! Well, I am the G-man, and that’s all you need to know about that! So, what am I reviewing next time? (Cut to the opening for…) Male voice (V.O singing): Good friends! Gonna get together with good friends! Everything is better with friends like you, there’s so much to do in Peppermint Park! (Cut back to the G-man) G-man: Okay, now we have problems! Category:Episode